As of today I have a second grader. He was SO excited to go back to school, no really... the boy loves school. And I love that he loves school. So even though there wasn't a need to sweeten up the experience, I decided to anyway. I'm sweet like that.
And this time I took pictures of the process. Kind of like Pioneer Woman, except I'm not filthy rich and I do all this stuff in between wiping butts, cleaning up dog poop, and unclogging toilets BY MYSELF. I also wash my hands A LOT and ONLY use Bath and Body Works antibacterial foaming soap. It kills more bacteria than the leading brands.
Anyway, before I digress into the annoyingness of internet "characters", I'll show you what I did.
First I gathered my ingredients. Food Blogging law states that I show you this:
That's four sticks of butter. Not because I get off on that (Paula Deen, I'm looking at you) but because I'm making a shizload of cookies.
I'm ashamed of my dirty vanilla bottle.
My sugar cookie recipe uses the good ole creaming method. I beat that butter and sugar until it looks, well, really beaten. Then I slowly add my dry ingredients and beat.
I cover it with a towel and peek a little.
I know the dough is done (and enough flour has been added) when it pulls cleanly away from the side:
Then I slop the dough out onto wax paper and roll to the thickness I want.
I use those yellow bands on my rolling pin as a thickness guide. Then I put all my rolled out layers in the freezer for - 30 minutes/an hour/a day/a week/MAYBE two weeks. OK, sometimes a month, but only people I don't like get those cookies. Oh, tuck in the sides of the wax paper so there is no freezer burn. Or better yet, wrap it in saran wrap.
When the dough is firm, remove one side of the wax paper and cut your cookies:
I cut these patterns out of cardstock and used a knife to run along the edges. I tend to hand-cut a lot. And yes, it kills my hourly wage.
Next is bag prep.
I've already listed out all the colors I'm going to mix, kind of figured out how much I need of each, and determined what size tip will go on each. Then I line it up in an orderly fashion.
Now comes the mixing.
Pardon me for not blog-scaping my royal icing method. It's actually pretty boring. Merigue powder plus water plus powdered sugar. Mix. Booorrrring.
Cause I'm super smart, I always start by mixing my white first. Then a yellow. Then an orange. Then a brown. THAT way, I don't have to wash the bowl between mixings. Another little trick is this:
(no I did not come up with this... the internet taught me)
Take your mixed up icing and plop it on some saran wrap.
Then twist it up like this:
Then shove it into a decorating bag that has a coupler inserted. (Ha ha. I said coupler inserted.)
Then you snip off the bit coming out the end and then put your tip and ring on. And voila! No messy spooning into the bags and the easiest cleanup ever.
After a million hours (because this IS the longest part of the cookie decorating process) you'll have this:
Each color is also a different consistancy - thicker for outlining, thinner for flooding larger areas, super thick for leaves, etc. I recommend have a firm design plan before starting the process, otherwise your cookies will suck.
Seriously, no shooting from the hip here.
What does that even mean?
It doesn't matter, because now it's time for the fun stuff. Below you can see the printout of the designs I'm going to use for the cookies. These are also the same designs I cut my cookie patterns from.
Here I'm simply tracing the outline of the falcon onto a page protector. One made specifically for the cookie industry to ensure that it's food grade. OK, maybe I bought them at Target. But they are washed. I always start with the darker colors first and work in batches letting each dry somewhat. If I want the colors to "meld" together more, I don't wait for them to dry.
I use this tracing method on any complicated design that I don't trust myself to free hand like the bus and the falcons. The chalkboard and apples were all freehand.
Another really useful trick is to have a four year old help you. They are SO helpful. And they don't pass on any germs at all, ever. Because of the Bath and Body Works soap.
It's not always convenvient to decorate cookies, because sometimes you can't stop. Your child may be yelling from the other room that their head is stuck in a vent, but you've got to lay down that second color of icing before the first dries! Sorry kid!
Pause:
Here's a picture of a mutant baby carrot.
Clara had asked for a snack while I was taking all these pictures so I had to include this. I took it as some kind of omen - like, reach for the stars or your husband is thinking about you right at this moment.
anyway...
(oh, and Clara wouldn't eat it either)
ANYWAY...
Here are the final products. I didn't take any pictures of me actually decorating any cookies because a) I forgot and b) I didn't remember.
My kid's teachers were the recipients of these goodies. I often think about how it's not just the kids going back, it's the teachers having to deal with the kids going back! I commend them. And we have some great ones this year.
The Falcon is the school symbol, so I made these for the front office and administration.
Caw, CAW!
I made a special one for Max's lunch box, too.
And so 2011-2012 begins...on a sugar high!
